Parenting, Child Loss, Grief and SIDS (Sudden Infant Death Syndrome)
Friday, September 16, 2016
On the 10 Year Anniversary of My Husband's Near-Fatal Wreck
I'm crying right now as I look at my baby girl who would have never been born if God had not saved my husband 10 years ago. That night, he had been working doing his job like any other night when he was nearly killed by a drunk driver. It was the hardest night of my life, not knowing if my husband would survive emergency brain surgery. I remember sitting in the quiet room so afraid that I might never see my husband again. He was my partner, my best friend and father to my child. I didn't know what I would do without him. I was still recovering from giving birth to our first child, Katie, who was barely five months at the time. It was so scary to hold a newborn baby in my arms while praying for my husband who was in the trauma center barely hanging on to life. I was told he had less than a 20% chance of living and if he did survive, to prepare myself because he would be in a persistent vegetative state. He would never be my husband again. He beat those odds and did survive but spent over two weeks on life support in an induced comma to combat his brain swelling followed by two weeks in the medical intensive care unit and over a month in a physical rehab facility. He had compound fractures in his right leg and left arm including a completely destroyed elbow, a broken pelvis, a fracture vertebrae and a 10 cm brain bleed. Even though he survived and the doctors finally released him from their care, his recovery didn't end when he got home. He had over two dozen surgeries, battled multiple infections and underwent intense physical rehabilitation over the course of six long years. It was full of up and downs and emotional and physical setbacks but every step of the way, I was by his side. This was where the “for worse” part of our marriage vows came in. I loved him through the worst of it and that was what allowed us to make it to where we are now in the better times. We weren't alone during those difficult days, God saw us through with the help of family and close friends. Our lives have changed so much since then, some wonderful things have occurred such as the birth of three more children as well as some tragedies when our son Dylan and my Dad both passed away less than two years apart. But today I can say we are exactly where we are meant to be, doing exactly what we were meant to do, surrounded by the perfect people God has put in our lives. I am grateful for the struggles because I can more greatly appreciate the victories. My husband is a walking testimony that God is still in the miracle business. He has overcome disabilities and odds stacked against him. I know now God saved him that night because God still has things for my husband to do and I feel blessed to be able to walk along side him while he does them.